Can You Don't?
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Can You Don't?
Can You Don't? is a weekly, comedic podcast where Joe Paisley and Bryan Albrandt delve into the depths of the Internet in order to retrieve the best and worst examples of humanity, while openly mocking themselves along the way for being complete idiots.
Episode të Fundit
174 episode
Can You Don't? | Fake Name. Begging. Lefty Loosey. Sperm Racing.
Nothing really brings the boys together like wearing racing jackets, being obnoxiously loud, and cheering on your sperm as it races against your buddy...
Can You Don't? | Crying in Bed. Wallet Drugs. Cow. Heart Attack.
If aliens offering immortality landed on Earth tomorrow and were willing to take you on a tour of the entire universe BUT you could never return to Ea...
Can You Don't? | Inside Out. Goose Men. Traffic. Airplane Pasta.
Joe might run for Mayor. And his entire platform will be built around upgrading ONE GODDAMN THING THAT HAS BEEN LEFT BEHIND SINCE 1995! Let's talk abo...
Can You Don't? | Role-play. Mac Salad. Flare Gun. Ticket.
How are serving sizes set? BECAUSE NO PERSON ON PLANET EARTH WOULD CALL THAT AMOUNT AN ACTUAL SERVING! Let's talk about that, taking the wrong kid hom...
Can You Don't? | Survey. Astronaut. Excel. Disabilities.
We've never had sex with a hamburger... but maybe we will after today's episode. Let's talk about that, the worst advice from an implied expert in his...
Can You Don't? | Brain Box. Speedo. Flamboyant. Flip an Egg.
Bryan is so close to shoving something in his butthole. Let's talk about that, the embarrassment of getting stuck in a tube slide as a grown-ass man,...
Can You Don't? | Terrified. Canadian Elk. Random. Pizza?
I think we all know that feeling when you just NEED to have a drink... but I'm not sure if stopping for beer while on your way to the hospital with yo...
Can You Don't? | Baywatch Boobs. Oven Door. Chiropractic. Nipper.
The future of relationships is going to be a little nutty. Imagine being with someone who only caters to your wants, needs, and world view... it's goi...
Can You Don't? | Gerbil Cannon. Napkin Chair. Gold. T-bone Steak.
Imagine all the things you purchase while out and about in your neck of the woods. Now imagine if the only way to purchase those things required you w...
Can You Don't? | Hockey Stick. Soap Bar. Dinner. Lalalalala.
Planet Fitness may not be the last place you'd expect to see a naked man running around in the ceiling, but it's probably pretty damn close. Let's tal...
Can You Don't? | Putin. Music Bingo. Nest. Pencil Party.
We're not doctors by any means, but something tells us that muting a patient's vital signs because the beeping is interrupting your game of music bing...
Can You Don't? | Stick Butt. Glass Shard. Centaur. Fun House.
Fashion is a funny thing. And chimps are taking it to a whole new level! Let's talk about that, adding lead-based paint to school lunches for some rea...
Can You Don't? | Lazy Susan. Medication. Bladder. Kit Kat.
Is it just a 90's kid thing or is something wrong with us? But every time we imagine something spinning we can't help but think about the Goddamn Grav...
Can You Don't? | Tin Cans. Garbage Man. Etiquette. Nude Beach.
We all know the ol' tin can and string telephone trick, yeah? What if that was your only form of communication regardless of the distance? Let's talk...
Can You Don't? | Penis Fingers. Boomerang. Lid. Robot Boxing.
Sometimes someone's name just fits who they are and what they do, right? So when you find out what Patches Magickbeans did... you'll have that same "t...
Can You Don't? | Snort. Sketch Artist. Gerty. Male Escort.
When you think of jobs Bryan could possibly have in this world... would you ever imagine courtroom sketch artist?! BECAUSE IT F**KING HAPPENED. Let's...
Can You Don't? | Counterfeit. Costco. Floppy. Gaping Goose.
Did you know that there's a bunch of people out there showing up to airports thinking their Costco card is an acceptable form of ID? That's silly. Let...
Can You Don't? | Fake Job. Golden Ticket. Suffered Walrus. The Letter B.
Half marathon? Hard. Full marathon? Very Hard. Ultra Marathon? Insanely hard. Ultra marathon while breastfeeding a baby and still managing to win your...
Can You Don't? | Turd Throw. Shoey. Popeye’s. News Baby.
AHHHHHH!!! THREE YEARS ALREADY?! You guys are amazing. Thank you so much for all the support over the last few years. Hopefully you enjoy this FLONG'E...
Can You Don't? | ***FREE BONUS PREVIEW*** Holding Cell. Harrison. Finger. Oh, Crazy.
*** FREE BONUS CONTENT PREVIEW AT THE END OF TODAY'S EPISODE | PLEASE CONSIDER JOINING PATREON ***
There's only so many ways to ma...
Can You Don't? | Woodpecker. Fertilize. Murphy. Antivenom.
What position did you play?! Let's talk about that, the implications of having one arm that's an entire foot longer than your other arm, lonely people...
Can You Don't? | Farm Noises. Dry Toes. Violence. Shipwreck.
IT'S SIMPLE. DO YOU WANT A GUN AND DRY TOES, OR NO GUN AND WET TOES?! Let's talk about that, how much would it cost to have a peacock as a pet, trying...
Can You Don't? | Soda Space. Mount Fuji. Moms. Tarantula.
If your car was stolen from your driveway and you just happen to find the exact same car you had stolen posted for sale online 70 miles away... would...
Can You Don't? | Popcorn. Catholic. Electric. Survival Wiener.
What would you do if you were babysitting, the kid you're babysitting asked you to check under the bed for monsters, then when you do check there's a...
Can You Don't? | Meth. Slug Shoes. Bad Girlfriend. Fabric Seats.
Is there anything more romantic than having some sloppy anal sex next a pile of used heroine needles? Let's talk about that, how fun it would be to be...
Can You Don't? | Fitted Sheet. Powerful. Wifi. Morally Gray.
A lot of our lives depend on having an internet connection, but have you ever tried to kill your mom because the Wifi got turned off? Let's talk about...
Can You Don't? | Flaming Ship. Viagra. Sneeze. Truck Nuts.
Everyone likes to have their ear nibbled on a little bit during sexy time. It feels pretty dang nice. But what if we added a harmonica to the mix? Let...
Can You Don't? | Terminated. Water Fountain. Next. Hairy Shoes.
If you had magic semen that could cure any disease in the world... would you walk around children's hospitals and be a hero, or would you avoid them b...
Can You Don't? | Seat Settings. Rope Swing. Toes. Shingles.
If you had to take a blind guess, how much do you think someone could sell a couple severed, dog-vomit covered human toes for on the black market? Nev...
Can You Don't? | Oysters. High Knees. Bland. Goblin Crawl.
When you think of having the ideal birthday, I bet you picture that day involving cleaning up someone else's poop all day long, right? Perfect. Let's...
Can You Don't? | Meatus Hole. Giant Cube. Cotton. Emergency Donuts.
Bryan pissed the bed. Let's talk about that, trying to reason with criminals over splitting lottery winnings because they stole your credit card to bu...
Can You Don't? | Noodle Bounty. Phobias. Thirteen. Sex Spells.
Did you know that for just a few hundred dollars, you can have a stranger on Etsy do a magic spell that will make your penis bigger or have the person...
Can You Don't? | 5 Yards. Garage. Star. HJ Potato.
We're not sure who needs to hear this but... if you're looking to blast a bunch of meth over a wall and into a prison, using a high-powered, air canno...
Can You Don't? | Double Yellow. Fleece Blanket. Sticker. Crematorium.
Picture yourself out on a nice date at a local watering hole with that special someone. However, this particular bar is located on death row so everyo...
Can You Don't? | Timeshare. Jump Rope. Neighborly. Claire's.
Well everyone... Bryan's vacation to Mexico ended in a way that we've all feared could happen to us. Let's talk about that, someone's dong getting stu...
Can You Don't? | Penis Pen. Door Slam. Rat. Wet Nose.
Nomination for "Best Friend" of the year: He tricks into getting a sex change and then threatens to kill your dad if you don't marry him! Let's talk a...
Can You Don't? | Scavenger Hunt. Fanny Pack. Ketamine. Hooker.
How would you react if you had some wild, spontaneous sex with your partner while out drinking on the town... only to find out the next morning that t...
Can You Don't? | Payphone. Sex Dream. Nut. Glass Bong.
We learn a new life lesson today everyone! If you have a severe nut allergy, don't let someone nut inside you because if that someone ate nuts, that n...
Can You Don't? | Garbage. Cheat Code. Bolt. Steering Wheel.
Would you ruin someone's life anonymously in order to avoid embarrassing yourself in front of over 120 million people? Let's talk about that, yanking...
Can You Don't? | Money Lawn. Closet. Enema. Folding Socks.
How many porn searches does it take to make "enema" the top searched term for an entire state in 2024?! Let's talk about that, forgetting your child's...